My musical output has greatly diminished since the death of my wife.
It changed me. She was the person I shared everything with, and that made everything more special. When she died it was hard to make anything because I felt, who am I going to share it with? My best friend was gone.
Things have improved as I came to terms with grief, but I still have a hard time getting motivated.
So, I’ve been looking for ways to, essentially, trick myself into starting pieces.
One is to compose ringtones and notifications for my (and maybe your) phone.
I got tired of the selection of built-in notification sounds, so I set out to make some that were more distinctive. I came up with, so far, 8 (I think), though same are variations of a common core.
The first custom ringtone I made was actually done a few years ago, when I dated someone briefly, around 2021. I thought it would be nice to have a ringtone specifically for her. That relationship didn’t last, but the ringtone remains.
I’ve written two more ringtones since then. It’s a good get-going trick because I’m mostly looking to get something that suits a utilitarian purpose. But, in the process, I find myself playing around with melody and harmony and instrumentation. All things that have been giving me ideas for longer pieces.
Something I noticed as I was listening to them recently was that I liked it when the ringtone didn’t sound, for lack of a better word, conclusive, or complete. What I mean is that they, in some way, feel (to my ears) as if they were extracted from something longer. This makes me want to go back and extend them, develop them, to discover just what that longer piece might be
These ringtones aren’t meant to reflect or describe the associated person. Of course, as I try out different melodies, I do ask myself if the piece is somehow suitable (by whatever broad definition) for the person, probably in a way that would only makes some sense to me. I check to hear if it somehow “works” in the given context.
But it has turned out that a resulting piece really does seem to capture something about the associated person.
I’ve so far not played the newer ones for the people they are for, and I have no idea if they would even like them. They have a certain angularity and chromaticism I like but may sound odd to others.
This chromaticism, etc. is a result of early versions sounding too “nice” or obvious or trite; I will write a piece, listen a bunch, use it, then later listen again to see if I still like it. That is when I start to tweak things. Or start over, maybe with some core part of the original, maybe from scratch.
In the end, since I’m the one who is going to be hearing these, I have to like it. But I’d like to think these friends would, too.
At some point I probably collect these ringtones and notifications and assemble an album for release (but without spelling out anyone’s name).
In addition to the ringtones and notification sounds Ive also composed two wake-up alarms. I wanted something not too chipper, not too harsh, something nice to ease me out of my dreams.
Last edited: Sun 10 Nov 2024